Comments on: Went to Church Yesterday http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/ These are the personal studies of one guy on his spiritual journey through Mormonism. Many articles, books and podcasts reviewed and reflected upon. Wed, 04 Nov 2009 09:42:08 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Catherine http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-4800 Catherine Mon, 09 Mar 2009 22:10:28 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-4800 I never considered it fortunate that my family isn't so religious until recently. I'm a Bible College Grad that has been completely disillusioned by the church for all of the reasons you've listed here and more. I can't count on one hand anymore the number of times I've been sexually harassed by pastors or leaders in ministry and if I don't comply (which I don't) s/he (yah women too!) will use his/her position to destroy my reputation before I can say anything. Knowing this, I've left one situation after another quietly knowing the lack of integrity in the leadership and nearly having my life destroyed over and over. My husband and I searched for a church for a long time and recently - we stopped. The idea that we'll ever find something is gone. Now we're redefining what God means to us in our every day lives. The interesting thing is - I don't think even the most dedicated Christians realize how religious their practices are in their expectation that people will adhere and follow. Worship on stage is the biggest personal promotion, perfectionist concert and not worship at all. Prayer is about what people want. God LOVES people. What you get when you read the BOM is all there is. Why would you need to practice anything to reach a great God who made the universe? I don't know...I'm still trying to define my theology without the church, but it's been far easier than be squelched over and over and discussing the same things with the church. MSN put out an article yesterday about people falling away from Religion. I think a lot of people are lost because the church spends too much time talking about stuff that doesn't matter instead of focusing on where lives are being changed and changing the world. I love the expressions of Bored In Vernal - that is amazing and inspiring. This is a great post! I never considered it fortunate that my family isn’t so religious until recently. I’m a Bible College Grad that has been completely disillusioned by the church for all of the reasons you’ve listed here and more. I can’t count on one hand anymore the number of times I’ve been sexually harassed by pastors or leaders in ministry and if I don’t comply (which I don’t) s/he (yah women too!) will use his/her position to destroy my reputation before I can say anything. Knowing this, I’ve left one situation after another quietly knowing the lack of integrity in the leadership and nearly having my life destroyed over and over. My husband and I searched for a church for a long time and recently – we stopped. The idea that we’ll ever find something is gone. Now we’re redefining what God means to us in our every day lives.
The interesting thing is – I don’t think even the most dedicated Christians realize how religious their practices are in their expectation that people will adhere and follow. Worship on stage is the biggest personal promotion, perfectionist concert and not worship at all. Prayer is about what people want.
God LOVES people. What you get when you read the BOM is all there is. Why would you need to practice anything to reach a great God who made the universe? I don’t know…I’m still trying to define my theology without the church, but it’s been far easier than be squelched over and over and discussing the same things with the church.
MSN put out an article yesterday about people falling away from Religion. I think a lot of people are lost because the church spends too much time talking about stuff that doesn’t matter instead of focusing on where lives are being changed and changing the world.
I love the expressions of Bored In Vernal – that is amazing and inspiring.
This is a great post!

]]> By: markii http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-4773 markii Fri, 15 Aug 2008 23:43:32 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-4773 thanks for the comment, INTJ Mom. i'm glad your mom hasn't tried reactivating you since you've left so long ago. i am completetely honest with my family now about not wanting to go back to the mormon church, and this week i've had the idea that showing them that i have replaced it (the church) with something else, they may lay off me in the future as well. i tell them i am a secular humanist now which shows i have accepted a new worldview and, yes, a new set of "beliefs" or standards. we'll see how this goes, though. i'm still NOM whenever the in-laws are in town and i think it will be this way with them for years to come (trust me, it's for the best) :) since you're an "agnostic/objectivist atheist", you might appreciate some of the quotes and such that i've posted on my other blog http://markii.wordpress.com c-ya thanks for the comment, INTJ Mom. i’m glad your mom hasn’t tried reactivating you since you’ve left so long ago. i am completetely honest with my family now about not wanting to go back to the mormon church, and this week i’ve had the idea that showing them that i have replaced it (the church) with something else, they may lay off me in the future as well. i tell them i am a secular humanist now which shows i have accepted a new worldview and, yes, a new set of “beliefs” or standards.

we’ll see how this goes, though. i’m still NOM whenever the in-laws are in town and i think it will be this way with them for years to come (trust me, it’s for the best) :)

since you’re an “agnostic/objectivist atheist”, you might appreciate some of the quotes and such that i’ve posted on my other blog http://markii.wordpress.com

c-ya

]]> By: INTJ Mom http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-4772 INTJ Mom Fri, 15 Aug 2008 21:24:39 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-4772 Just found this blog. My heart goes out to Bored In Vernal as well. Fortunately for me, religion,in general isn't a huge part of my family. My Mom is the only Mormon on her side. Her siblings and other relatives run the whole gamut when it comes to religion. On my dad's side, he's agnostic, one of his sisters and her family are LDS, but they live thousands of miles away and I hardly know them. My other paternal aunt is loosely Christian. My husband grew up in more of a deist household. My mom was upset when I left the Mormon religion, and initially threatened to disown me, but I called her bluff. She cares a lot about what her siblings think and they would've thought very poorly of her for disowning a child just because they don't want to be the same religion the parent is. She backed down once it was clear I wasn't going to. That was nearly 20 years ago and even though my Mom is still active and believing, we get along fine. She hasn't tried to activate me or argue with me for a very long time now. One of my long time closest friends is still believing Mormon. She knows I'm agnostic/objectivist atheist and it doesn't cause any problems. My other good friends are either NOM or pretty much non-religious. I don't envy the people who feel like they need to stay active in order to feel loved and accepted by their family and friends. However, with the type of personality I have - low socializing, social network needs - I honestly don't think my decision to leave the Mormon faith would've been curtailed if all my family was TBM and I was a lone dissenter. I tend to have the attitude that with billions of people on the planet, there's no need to put up with people who want to control you and won't accept you as you are - even if they are relatives. Just found this blog. My heart goes out to Bored In Vernal as well. Fortunately for me, religion,in general isn’t a huge part of my family. My Mom is the only Mormon on her side. Her siblings and other relatives run the whole gamut when it comes to religion. On my dad’s side, he’s agnostic, one of his sisters and her family are LDS, but they live thousands of miles away and I hardly know them. My other paternal aunt is loosely Christian. My husband grew up in more of a deist household.

My mom was upset when I left the Mormon religion, and initially threatened to disown me, but I called her bluff. She cares a lot about what her siblings think and they would’ve thought very poorly of her for disowning a child just because they don’t want to be the same religion the parent is. She backed down once it was clear I wasn’t going to. That was nearly 20 years ago and even though my Mom is still active and believing, we get along fine. She hasn’t tried to activate me or argue with me for a very long time now. One of my long time closest friends is still believing Mormon. She knows I’m agnostic/objectivist atheist and it doesn’t cause any problems. My other good friends are either NOM or pretty much non-religious.

I don’t envy the people who feel like they need to stay active in order to feel loved and accepted by their family and friends. However, with the type of personality I have – low socializing, social network needs – I honestly don’t think my decision to leave the Mormon faith would’ve been curtailed if all my family was TBM and I was a lone dissenter. I tend to have the attitude that with billions of people on the planet, there’s no need to put up with people who want to control you and won’t accept you as you are – even if they are relatives.

]]> By: jon http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-3300 jon Sat, 22 Sep 2007 21:53:00 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-3300 I feel the same way, I know the church is true but im sick of doing and hearing the same thing everyday :P never felt like ive been accepted by the people ever since i joined the church either, maybe the natural man is just to much a part of my personality? I feel the same way, I know the church is true but im sick of doing and hearing the same thing everyday :P never felt like ive been accepted by the people ever since i joined the church either, maybe the natural man is just to much a part of my personality?

]]> By: Mark2 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-1473 Mark2 Sat, 02 Jun 2007 08:48:52 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-1473 To Bored in Vernal: You break my heart (in a good way) with your beautiful, open, courageous, yet pure and passive expression. I wish I could give you my freedom, to be able to be your self. Honest with Myself To Bored in Vernal:
You break my heart (in a good way) with your beautiful, open, courageous, yet pure and passive expression. I wish I could give you my freedom, to be able to be your self.
Honest with Myself

]]> By: Randy http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-1157 Randy Tue, 08 May 2007 01:42:57 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-1157 Mark, You remind me a lot of my brother. He struggles with a lot of the same doctrinal issues. Best wishes. Mark,
You remind me a lot of my brother. He struggles with a lot of the same doctrinal issues. Best wishes.

]]> By: dalejr410 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-665 dalejr410 Thu, 01 Mar 2007 03:54:06 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-665 Hahaha... That is too funny. Yeah I would have thought more emphasis would have been put on speaking in another man's voice, too. Hahaha… That is too funny. Yeah I would have thought more emphasis would have been put on speaking in another man’s voice, too.

]]> By: John Dehlin http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-655 John Dehlin Wed, 21 Feb 2007 02:59:07 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-655 Mark = The Man Mark = The Man

]]> By: Bored in Vernal http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-653 Bored in Vernal Tue, 20 Feb 2007 20:32:04 +0000 http://onedudesms.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/went-to-church-yesterday/#comment-653 Well, I guess we all know what side I'm on... :) Mark, I'm so sad that you've put on black. How do we ever do it? I hope your experience as a NOM can be more like John Dehlin's than like mine. John seems to be able to do it while remaining cheerful and true to himself. Good luck. Well, I guess we all know what side I’m on… :)

Mark, I’m so sad that you’ve put on black. How do we ever do it? I hope your experience as a NOM can be more like John Dehlin’s than like mine. John seems to be able to do it while remaining cheerful and true to himself.

Good luck.

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